How Moralizing Food Traps You in a Cycle of Guilt and Overindulgence

Have you ever hidden in the pantry, quickly eating something because you didn't want anyone to see? Have you felt wrong eating certain foods, worried that someone might judge you for what you were eating or how much?

If so, you've experienced the damaging effects of moralizing food. We're exploring how labeling food and behaviors as good or bad can actually sabotage your health goals, leading to overeating, binge eating, or eating in secret.

What Moralizing Food Really Means

Moralizing food means labeling it as good or bad, right or wrong. It's giving food a measuring stick of morality. But morality should be reserved for things that are truly good or evil. When we moralize food and our health actions, it can completely derail our efforts.

This concept emerged from a powerful discussion in The Wellness Mastery Society during our monthly book study of The Willpower Instinct by Kelly McGonigal. The insights we uncovered can transform how you approach your wellness journey.

Understanding Moral Licensing

Moral licensing is a psychological term describing what happens after we do something we perceive as good. Strangely, when we eat something we think is good or do something we consider virtuous, we give ourselves permission to do something we label as bad. It's like earning a free pass because we've been good.

For example, if you've ever thought "I worked out today, so I deserve this treat," you've experienced moral licensing.

Research backs this up. In one study, participants who thought about doing a good deed like serving in their community were 60% less likely to give to a charitable cause later. Why? Because they felt they had already fulfilled their moral obligation.

When we focus on the things we do that are good, no matter how small, we convince ourselves that we are good. We make it mean something about our identity instead of separating our behavior from who we are as people.

The Cheat Day Problem

This is also where cheat days come into play. Side note: I dislike the term cheat days. "Cheat" has a negative connotation, and when you really think about it, the only person you're cheating is yourself. There's so much power in our words and what we say to ourselves. Even the term "cheat day" can add to this moral licensing struggle.

If you label yourself as good for eating a salad or going to the gym, you might feel justified in indulging in something that contradicts your health goals later. It's a vicious cycle: doing something good, then rewarding yourself with something that ultimately sabotages your progress.

The Root Issue: Conflicting Desires

The root of this issue lies in our desires. If we truly desire something we label as bad, like donuts instead of broccoli, then every time we force ourselves to choose the "good" option, we're setting ourselves up for a reward later that aligns with our true desires. This creates internal conflict, a constant tug-of-war between what we think is good and what we actually want.

Instead of focusing on the food itself, it's important to focus on what you truly want long term. Do you want diabetes, weight gain, inflammation, and all the consequences that come with the donut? Or do you want energy and to feel amazing in your body?

Part of this moral licensing issue is also about losing sight of the long term goal. When we're stuck in the good versus bad framework, we focus on immediate gratification rather than our deeper desires.

How Diet Culture Amplifies the Problem

Diet culture plays directly into this trap. Many diets give us rules, telling us what we should and shouldn't eat. We start labeling foods like carbs as bad and vegetables as good. Some diets even go as far as declaring specific foods like bananas or meat as bad. There's currently a strong movement moralizing animal proteins.

We need to be highly aware when this happens. Start paying attention to the labels food companies or organizations place on food and activities.

When we're conditioned this way, moralizing food becomes ingrained by diet culture. It doesn't stop at food either. It extends to our actions like exercise or even rest. How often have you heard someone say they felt bad for skipping a workout or good for resisting dessert? This language is harmful because it creates a moral framework around our choices that simply doesn't belong there.

The Identity Crisis Behind Food Moralizing

In The Willpower Instinct, Kelly McGonigal describes moral licensing as an identity crisis at its core.

Follow this logic: We only reward ourselves for good behavior if we believe that, deep down, we are the kind of person who truly wants to be bad.

This creates a scenario where every act of self-control feels like punishment, and self-indulgence becomes the ultimate reward.

This is where identity plays a crucial role. Who we believe we are influences every choice we make. If you see yourself as someone who struggles with self-control, then every good decision will feel like a temporary victory, followed by the inevitable bad decision as a reward.

Understanding our human behavior and why we do what we do is fascinating. It's all part of understanding how we master ourselves. We first have to know why we do what we do, then work on changing this conditioning.

Redefining Self-Mastery

True self-mastery isn't about labeling our choices as good or bad. It's about aligning our actions with our values and desires in a way that supports our long-term goals. It's knowing what's best for us and choosing it on purpose, not because we've earned it through being good, but because it's part of who we are.

This may require redefining your identity. Letting go of an old identity that sees indulgence as a reward and embracing a new identity that finds joy and fulfillment in choices that support your health.

It's a shift from seeing food and behaviors through a moral lens to seeing them through a lens of alignment with your true self and your goals.

Three Steps to Break Free From Food Moralizing

Eliminate Good and Bad Language

The first step is removing the descriptors of good and bad, right and wrong from your health journey. Watch your language and the language of those influencing your decisions about food and health.

Food is not good or bad. It's just food. Your choices are not moral decisions. They're simply actions that either align with your goals or they don't. This subtle shift in language creates a massive shift in how you relate to food.

Cultivate Identity Alignment

Focus on cultivating an identity that aligns with your health goals. Instead of rewarding yourself for eating vegetables, start seeing it as a natural part of who you are: someone who values their health and makes choices that support it.

When healthy choices come from identity rather than obligation, they become sustainable. You're no longer forcing yourself to be good. You're simply being yourself.

Practice Self-Compassion

Understand that this shift won't happen overnight. It's a process of rewiring how you think about food, your actions, and your identity. But with time and practice, you can break free from the cycle of moralizing food and start living in alignment with your true values.

Be patient with yourself as you unlearn years of conditioning from diet culture. Each time you catch yourself using moral language around food, gently redirect your thoughts to alignment language instead.

Your Path Forward

Moralizing food and behaviors can trap you in a cycle of guilt and overindulgence. But by shifting your perspective and redefining your identity, you can break free from this cycle and create a healthier, more sustainable relationship with food and your body.

You have the power to redefine your relationship with food and your health. It starts with changing how you see yourself and the choices you make. When you remove the moral framework and replace it with values alignment, food becomes neutral and your choices become empowered.

Ready to break free from the good food, bad food trap? Listen to the full episode of Wellness Mastery with Jen Hoyer for more insights on creating a guilt-free relationship with food.

Listen to Episode 6: How Moralizing Food Traps You in a Cycle of Guilt and Overindulgence